I wish I had an elephant.  Like seriously.  I would ride him--my dear Mr. Elephant--to and from classes.  I would never be late.  Jeff wouldn't hate me so much...

      Anyway, yes, an elephant would make my life so much better.  He would be my little pet.  But big.  I would give him a grand name to reflect his magnificent nature.  Like Edward the Second, Petrov the Innocent, or Harrison Ford.  As he stomped and crashed across campus from Fulton to Barrington, I would sit atop him like a queen--or at least like a very indie person.  I would be the hipster of hipsters.  Yes, I need to get an elephant.

     I think I would also like a pack of dogs.  Dogs of all kinds.  They would band all together and run wildly after  Harrison Ford the Innocent as we trekked across Gordon.  They would sleep in the woods with Petrov Ford at night.  And we would all be so happy.

     I wish I was in the band Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeros.  We would tour around on elephants with packs and packs of wild dogs chasing madly after us.  It would be brilliant....